I Have Not Stopped Thinking About Heidi Klum as a Worm For Months

By: would u still love me if i was a worm (threat)

If we’re gonna talk fashion, we have to address the most important night of the year for bitches who love to go all out on a themed outfit. I am, of course, talking about Halloween, undoubtedly the most fashion-forward holiday. When it comes to Halloween costumes, there are obviously varying levels of commitment. Some people endeavor to look cute, while some commit to looking as weird or scary as possible. Some people just throw something together the night before using the clothes from their closet, and some of us start brainstorming ideas months in advance so that we can assemble the perfect outfit. Now, normal everyday people not putting time, effort, and money into an elaborate ensemble they will only wear once? Dressing cute for pictures with friends rather than going ham on the weird Halloween vibes? Perfectly acceptable! There are definitely more essential things that require their attention and finances. However, celebrities with insane amounts of money and resources at their disposal falling short? Not slaying to the literal highest degree? Unacceptable.

But don’t worry, we’re not here to acknowledge those penny-pinching bitches. We’re here to discuss some of the most iconic celebrity halloween costumes that have ever graced my eager little eyes. And by that I mean we’re here to talk about one specific woman who takes the cake when it comes to Halloween fashion—the Queen of Halloween herself: Heidi Klum.

I don’t know literally anything about this woman other than the fact that nobody commits as hard as she does to the bit. Every fashion choice she has ever made for her Halloween costumes has simultaneously been fun and funky and also deeply haunting. This bitch once went as the forbidden fruit from the literal Bible while her husband was dressed as Eve in order to incorporate her pregnant belly into her costume. I’m obsessed with her.

A non-comprehensive list of things that Heidi Klum has dressed as for Halloween:

• An incredibly realistic monkey

• An anatomically correct human body, sans skin

• Cartoon accurate Jessica Rabbit

• Cartoon accurate By: would u still love me if i was a worm (threat)

If we’re gonna talk fashion, we have to address the most important night of the year for bitches who love to go all out on a themed outfit. I am, of course, talking about Halloween, undoubtedly the most fashion-forward holiday. When it comes to Halloween costumes, there are obviously varying levels of commitment. Some people endeavor to look cute, while some commit to looking as weird or scary as possible. Some people just throw something together the night before using the clothes from their closet, and some of us start brainstorming ideas months in advance so that we can assemble the perfect outfit. Now, normal everyday people not putting time, effort, and money into an elaborate ensemble they will only wear once? Dressing cute for pictures with friends rather than going ham on the weird Halloween vibes? Perfectly acceptable! There are definitely more essential things that require their attention and finances. However, celebrities with insane amounts of money and resources at their disposal falling short? Not slaying to the literal highest degree? Unacceptable.

But don’t worry, we’re not here to acknowledge those penny-pinching bitches. We’re here to discuss some of the most iconic celebrity halloween costumes that have ever graced my eager little eyes. And by that I mean we’re here to talk about one specific woman who takes the cake when it comes to Halloween fashion—the Queen of Halloween herself: Heidi Klum.

I don’t know literally anything about this woman other than the fact that nobody commits as hard as she does to the bit. Every fashion choice she has ever made for her Halloween costumes has simultaneously been fun and funky and also deeply haunting. This bitch once went as the forbidden fruit from the literal Bible while her husband was dressed as Eve in order to incorporate her pregnant belly into her costume. I’m obsessed with her.

A non-comprehensive list of things that Heidi Klum has dressed as for Halloween:

• An incredibly realistic monkey

• An anatomically correct human body, sans skin

• Cartoon accurate Jessica Rabbit

• Cartoon accurate Princess Fiona (of Shrek fame)

• The werewolf from the “Thriller” music video

I cannot emphasize enough that she completely disappears in each and every one of these costumes. Her face is unrecognizable. She becomes the character. She has the time and money to spare and, oh boy, does she put them to use. Which, of course, brings me to the most iconic fashion choice ever made by anyone in all of Halloween history: Heidi Klum dressed as a worm.

This ensemble has wormed its way into my psyche for months in the best possible way. I can’t think about it without laughing. What possessed her to do this? How much money did she put into it? Does it even look that much like an actual worm? She’s literally quoted as saying that she was scared she was going to suffocate in the costume and yet she still put that shit on for an entire night (in addition to the hours of assembly that I have to assume it required). She had to be rolled everywhere because she couldn’t even walk. Interviews were conducted with her while she was laying on the goddamn ground. She took that worm role so fucking seriously.

There will never be another slay this astronomical when it comes to Halloween fashion, no one can ever top this. I, for one, think this should become the new fashion standard all year round—it would actually solve a lot of problems. You want people to start caring about the environment? Make them see the world through a worm’s eyes. You want the city streets kept clean? Force everyone to roll everywhere. You want to win an argument? Simply push that fucker over because it is guaranteed they will not be able to get up. Heidi Kulm as a worm truly is the answer to everything.

Princess Fiona (of Shrek fame)

• The werewolf from the “Thriller” music video

I cannot emphasize enough that she completely disappears in each and every one of these costumes. Her face is unrecognizable. She becomes the character. She has the time and money to spare and, oh boy, does she put them to use. Which, of course, brings me to the most iconic fashion choice ever made by anyone in all of Halloween history: Heidi Klum dressed as a worm.

This ensemble has wormed its way into my psyche for months in the best possible way. I can’t think about it without laughing. What possessed her to do this? How much money did she put into it? Does it even look that much like an actual worm? She’s literally quoted as saying that she was scared she was going to suffocate in the costume and yet she still put that shit on for an entire night (in addition to the hours of assembly that I have to assume it required). She had to be rolled everywhere because she couldn’t even walk. Interviews were conducted with her while she was laying on the goddamn ground. She took that worm role so fucking seriously.

There will never be another slay this astronomical when it comes to Halloween fashion, no one can ever top this. I, for one, think this should become the new fashion standard all year round—it would actually solve a lot of problems. You want people to start caring about the environment? Make them see the world through a worm’s eyes. You want the city streets kept clean? Force everyone to roll everywhere. You want to win an argument? Simply push that fucker over because it is guaranteed they will not be able to get up. Heidi Kulm as a worm truly is the answer to everything.