WE FUCKING DID IT!!!

By: J Money Swag

SELINSGROVE, PA- Kevin Hamilton has officially left the building. Like literally. He has left (with his bitch, Peter). Here’s a thread of his most recent update on theslap.com.

We have a farewell letter to our beloved guy. In the tune of Joy to the World. We ask that you please sing along during the hard times Susquehanna University is facing while losing our beloved soldier (aka our favorite person to make fun of.)

Joy to Kevin Hamilton:

Dear Kevin Hamilton, we won’t miss you.

We won’t, fucking, miss you

Praise all The Squirrels

Oh praise all The Squirrels.

Goodbye Kevin Hamilton

You looked like a hairless rat

We won’t be sick

Oh no, we won’t be sick

From eating our $3000 meal plan

That paid for your porn subscription.

All we have to say at The Squirrel is, you’re welcome, Susquehanna. You are so very welcome.