We’re Back on the Good Timeline

These trends are so back, they’re rising from the grave, they’re building a new fanatic religion around themselves in celebration of this holy day! Okay maybe not that serious, but yes that serious. We’re back on the good timeline now, bitches, and to commemorate this wonderful achievement let’s take a look at which of our long time buddies are coming back for good!

Assassinating Presidents!

Johnny Wilkesy Boothy could not be more proud! Actually he could be because you dumbass fucks keep missing, but at least we got the spirit! 

Hating on Trashy White Women!

Hating on women has always been a socially acceptable trend, but at least now the masses are turning on the psychos that deserve it. Whether you make a trashy movie glamorizing domestic violence, promote your hair care line for the movie you starred in while glamorizing domestic violence, be a TERF on Twitter, or write a song about how you didn’t groom kids when you asked them about their virginity, at least we can collectively laugh at trashy white women peacefully once more. 

Flip Phones!

Save me retro chic from this post-capitalistic world of authoritarian government eyes. 

Flare Jeans!

They just look cooler, okay guys? Yeah skinny jeans never fit me, but that’s not why I prefer baggy styles, I swear! You guys are just mean…

Underconsumption!

Maybe you’re just poor, or maybe you’re participating in the coolest TokTik trend about not selling your soul to the materialist society we’ve created. Who’s to say?! Make a cute video about it, collect your minimum wage paycheck, and go about your day. 

Not Stressing Me Out!

Please…please God let this be so back right now. 

Voting!

Making sure the basic rights and freedoms of your country aren’t stripped away from millions of people as well as protecting the foundations of democracy are so very back right now. Making your voice heard in November is one of the biggest things you can do so that we, as a country, remain so back.