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THE SQUIRREL

Susquehanna University's satirical news source

Halloween Costumes I Expect to See This Year

Hallow Een

The Monster Edition

Halloween Costumes I Expect to See This Year

I’m tired of all the boring costumes I see every year, where’s the creativity, the passion?

The Bowl Again

The Crypt Kickers

The Monster Edition

The Bowl Again

(The Bowl Again)

Fuck Them Kids

an adult by legal terms

The Monster Edition

Fuck Them Kids

Everyone is always so damn concerned about the children.

Are Your Roommates Eldritch Horrors? Mine Are!

cryptid wrangler

The Monster Edition

Are Your Roommates Eldritch Horrors? Mine Are!

The first step in surviving is identifying which being has made its mark in your living space.

A Conversation of Equals

Squirrel Girl

The Monster Edition

A Conversation of Equals

Letters to and from Prez Green

R/AskASquatch

Big Foot

The Monster Edition

R/AskASquatch

I broke into some shitty school and took out a column in the newspaper to answer a few of your big questions.

WHERE THE BOWTIES COME FROM

John E. Dippshitte

The Monster Edition

WHERE THE BOWTIES COME FROM

I discovered a far greater, more terrible answer to a question I never knew I had: where President Green’s bowties come from.

Which Campus Housing is Most Likely to Survive the Zombie Apocalypse?

Res Life

The Monster Edition

Which Campus Housing is Most Likely to Survive the Zombie Apocalypse?

Here is the Squirrel’s definitive guide to which Res Hall would survive the zombie apocalypse.

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Latest Stories

It is Time.

We’re Back on the Good Timeline

If Politics Are Going to Bore Me to Death, I’d Rather Drink to Death

Thought????

Idolizing Celebrities Is And Has Been So Over

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