Susquehanna Presidential Scandal Revealed
After University President L. Jay Lemons announced Monday that he will leave Susquehanna in 2017, sources revealed that the departure was...
Danielle Bettendorf
An Op Ed. on the Fake ID Crisis
American media has once again blown something as stupid as a few drunk kids trying to get booze out of proportion. Here are the facts and...
Eric Krinick
Angsty Teenager Compares Life to Struggles in Syria
At Wharton High School in Millsborough, IN, 14 year old Alex Dunn announced today via text message to his best friend of nine weeks Dave...
Eric Krinick
College Student Psyching Herself Up for ‘Really Awesome’ Nap Tomorrow
In an exclusive interview with The Squirrel, Susquehanna University sophomore Maggie O’Donnell reported that she’s spent the last several...
Caroline Miller
Outsmart Your Professor: Don’t Write the Paper
Your professor told you exactly when your final exam is due. You were handed a syllabus outlining exactly what was expected of you. You...
Mitchell Roshannon and Jenna Danyew
Professor Forgets Password, Advisees Plunged Into Chaos
The end of the registration period found dozens of university students in panic because they had not yet received lifts on their...
The Squirrel
A Feminist Proposal
2 Beers—$7, 3 Margaritas—$15, 4 Jell-O Shots—$20, Taking home the girl who drank all of the above…PRICELESS. These words, printed on...
Jillian Mannarino
Caramel Cornhusk Set to Outshine Current Pumpkin Spice Craze
In light of the popularity of the Pumpkin Spice-flavored drinks, Starbucks has recently announced the upcoming release of a full line of...
Ashleigh Tomcics
Susquehanna University Considers New Mascot
Amidst much recent criticism and debate over the political correctness of the university's mascot, The Crusader, Susquehanna...
Matt Stulberg
Squirrels Embraced by University: Minimal Injuries Reported
To celebrate change, the administration has happily announced the new and improved Dog Days at Susquehanna, now with smaller, furrier,...
Sam Thompson
